Dear Folks –
I am still away in India with one more week to go. I think I’ve spent my time wisely considering most of the time the temps. have been in the high 30’s centigrade. I did get up early each morning to attend the chanting of the Vedas and the bhajans – both were delightful as always. Most of my days were spent in the ashram garden, where the birds sang their mantras and the butterflies were fluttering in the Neem trees, and the wading birds attending to fishing in the lily pond. I shall miss all of this dreadfully but i feel my physical strength is not up to more. (I wish it was). Last night it rained and what a relief it has been. The morning (today) brought cooler weather and breezes. I bought pink roses, one for my hair, the other for the altar in the garden. (sigh) – I wish I could be as free at home – Eve
I saw grief drinking a cup of sorrow and called out, “It tastes sweet, does it not?”
“You’ve caught me,” grief answered, “and you’ve ruined my business. How can I sell sorrow when you know it’s a blessing?” ~ Rumi
“When there’s no getting over that rainbow, when the smallest of dreams won’t come true….” – Yes, I’ve been there, haven’t you? The need to reach out and touch another, and yet that ‘other’ is not able to deal with us or our pain. Perhaps their own pain is all too much. Who knows. We often befriend the most unlikely people and for all the wrong reasons. What were we thinking of ? The truth is, we often don’t think at all on these matters. Now it’s time to let go and move on. For when we don’t let go, a relationship can become bad, or even toxic to the point of despair. The Great Wisdom Masters tell us: “Our good friends are our gifts in life. Others are our painful lessons.”
I concur with this. But even painful lessons pass, although perhaps etched on our hearts forever more. David Whyte has written this beautiful piece, on ‘Heartbreak’, that I want to share with you.
Heartbreak is unpreventable; the natural outcome of caring for people and things over which we have no control, of holding in our affections those who inevitably move beyond our line of sight. Heartbreak begins the moment we are asked to let go but cannot. In other words, it colors and inhabits and magnifies each and every day.
Heartbreak is not a visitation, but a path that human beings follow through even the most average lifetime. Heartbreak is our indication of sincerity: in a love relationship, in work, in trying to learn a musical instrument, in the attempt to shape a better, more generous self. Heartbreak is the beautifully helpless side of love and affection and is just as much an essence and emblem of care as the spiritual athlete’s quick but abstract ability to let go.
Heartbreak has its own way of inhabiting time and its own beautiful and trying patience in coming and going. Heartbreak is inescapable, yet we use the word ‘heartbreak’ as if it only occurs when things have gone wrong: an unrequited love, a shattered dream, a child lost before their time. Heartbreak, we hope, is something we hope we can avoid; something to guard against, a chasm to be carefully looked for and then walked around. The hope is to find a way to place our feet where the elemental forces of life will keep us in the manner to which we want to be accustomed and which will keep us from the losses that all other human beings have experienced without exception since the beginning of conscious time.
But heartbreak may be the very essence of being human, of being on the journey from here to there, and of coming to care deeply for what we find along the way…
From the upcoming Third Readers’ Circle Essay – ‘HEARTBREAK’